I call myself the accidental writer. I pride myself on my ability to tell stories. But what happens when words freeze? When the very same words that came tumbling out from my head on to screen or paper suddenly seem to have lost their way? They say writer’s block is normal. That it will be ok at the end. But the problem is, I see no end to this. Even this post, which I’ve wanted to write for months, perhaps even years on end, is the result of a battle of wits between my mind and my heart.
My heart holds emotions that my mind can’t express. My intelligence and my vocabulary fail me as I grapple with a number of emotions ranging from insecurity to love to sheer joy, all at once. How do I explain how these conflicting emotions constantly jostle for space in my heart, one sometimes overpowering the other? Perhaps this is life. A complex combination of joy and sorrow, of confidence and insecurity, of love and loneliness, leaving us with no choice but to live it.