Humour,  Pointless posts

What women want…

Dare I even talk? But, since I am such a sweet person, I decided to give my male readers (ok…I am delusional) some information on what women really want.

There are three major criteria of eligibility for a guy: beauty, intelligence and wealth. Now ideally, a guy should possess all three for a girl to choose him. But then, the probability of that happening is infinitesimally minute. The intersection of the three sets can be illustrated like this:

As you can see, the probability of men fulfilling all three criteria is about one in a million. That leaves us with very little choice. To make it mathematically accurate: there are a total of three choices, not counting the eligible bachelor bit.

Scenario 1 – Man is good-looking and rich but hasn’t a gram of brain in him.

In this, you have two options.

Option 1: take the money, have fun, do your thing, but don’t expect him understand the finer nuances of existential philosophy. For that, you have friends.
Option 2: fret and fume that you have a brainless husband, get depressed, and commit suicide.

Scenario 2 – Man is rich and intelligent but not good-looking

Two options again!
Option 1: Tell yourself that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Thank your stars that the man has the brains, the car, the house and the servants to wait on you hand and foot. Enjoy life.
Option 2: fret and fume that you have an ugly husband, get depressed, and commit suicide.

Scenario 3 – Man is intelligent and good-looking, but not rich

Option 1: Live life for what it’s worth. Be happy without the car and the house. Go out for dances and plays (only if you don’t have to pay for the entry), work your ass off for that house, that car and those servants.
Option 2: fret and fume that you have no money, get depressed, and commit suicide.

Now, as you can see, option two rules itself our because of its sheer stupidity. That leaves you with the option of reconciling with fate and living life. But, there is a small problem. I would much rather marry an ugly, poor but intelligent man than marry a stinking rich Greek god with no brains. However, given that intelligent men, in themselves, are such an endangered species, it becomes a bit difficult to decide. As they say, life is not fair!

Disclaimer: This post is inspired by conversations with Sriram and Sankhya and has no reference to any person living or dead. It is all in good humour and I don’t want to handle trolls accusing me of being shallow and a gold-digger.

12 Comments

  • Vikas Gupta

    Very interesting! 😀

    I fall in the third category; may get a job soon and will then pop up the question to my unrequited love! Amen!

    And your blog has a great theme; convenience and comfort!

    All the best. Trust me, you stand a better chance than Category 1

  • teddie

    its just funny to know what women want…i think its a good one …i dont know in which one do i fall ..please take a guess..ugly brainless ,creditcard user…..where do i go 🙂

  • teddie

    hey just to add are you ok and humorous now …I am still sulking like a fool …feels good that atleast you are over the foolishness..damn me !!!lol 🙂 😀

  • Kumar

    Good analysis,But are you sure only these three matter for you or a woman.Than you need to rethink..What about the character of a Guy….? even your defined “eligible bachelor” might be short of it..than? thats why now a days the most happy marriages are happening in daily wagers or lower class indians.They wont go for sucide due to lack of money,intelligence or Good-Looking.

    Hope you will understand what is needed most.

  • amrutha

    People…chill ok? As I mentioned in my disclaimer, it is supposed to be a joke. Gosh! The point of the joke is so lost if I have to explain it to every person who chooses to drop by!

  • Saidapetai vadakari

    Aiyo! Aiyo! Aiyo! never knew men have actually lost it here. Where is your sense of humour guys?

    Lol…I give up!

  • Imp's Mom

    haha… how did I miss this post!!!???

    there is another option u knw, before we go to suicide…. have an affair! 😛

    have something for u! 🙂

    Thank you so much!! 🙂 And the affair…hmm…another friend suggested the same thing… 🙂

  • aarti

    I want to meet these women who want such guys….
    I only want one with who I can have good long fun conversations, decent sense of humour and will be the kind who devotes time for me…. 😛

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